IT ALL BEGINS AND ENDS IN YOUR MIND
From six pack to pot belly
Before my entire blog drowns in heartbreak and worries if my relationship with “P” is gonna last, I’m gonna hurry up and tell you about – yet another – downside to “project” baby.
Most women become affected by the hormones, they receive during fertility treatments, but it is widely different how they affect each woman. For me, I haven’t really felt down or the depression I’ve heard other women describe.
My boyfriend might not quite agree with me – hence the unfortunate situation we’re in now.
Instead, I have felt the depression in the wake of my miscarriage. Big time.
But as I’ve described earlier there’s a lot more to it than “just” the dead fetus.
My body has changed…
And I haven’t even been lucky enough to complete a pregnancy.
Still my weight have been steadily rising during the time I’ve been doing the fertility treatment.
My clothes just don’t fit me anymore.
I have always been relatively well trained.
Not even slim.
But of a completely normal build.
Always with “full thighs” and a round butt.
But in good shape.
And well trained.
I’ve always been extremely satisfied with my female curves and I’ve never wanted to be thin.
I just want to be strong, be in good shape and of a normal build.
But that goes completely by the board when I’m in fertility treatment. It did in 2010/2011 too when I was in fertility treatment as a single.
But I came “back on track” during 2012/2013 as the picture above shows.
Then I got a boyfriend in 2013 and in 2014, I started fertility treatment again. This time with my boyfriend.
This is reality now…
We’ll let the picture stand for a moment…
I have to say that I’m very well aware that I don’t get fat from nothing.
Of course not.
I admit I have a sweet tooth. So I eat a lot of candy, but not more than I “usually” do even though the need for sugar feels stronger when I’m in fertility treatment.
I have no idea why.
Maybe it’s something I’m imagining?
At the same time, I’ve had an injury that has made me unable to exercise for a long period between 2013 and 2014, and when you go from doing Crossfit, strength training and weight lifting 6 times a week to zero exercise a week for a while, of course you gain weight fast.
Just to be clear, the injury wasn’t an exercise injury. It’s an old injury in my elbow that has plagued me on and off for years and which by the end of 2013 flared up again full force and wouldn’t really go “off” again.
I got a block in my elbow. It helped somewhat. The fluid and inflammation disappeared. But it doesn’t take away the cause of the injury.
After having been through the whole lot of the health services, I took matters into my own hands and sought help with Randløv and Boesen.
It’s a place I can whole-heartedly recommend if you have disabilities or if you just want to get into tip-top shape in the very best way.
They put me on a strict autoimmune protocol and I was trained in some functional exercises and a lot of stretching, which I can’t really explain, but it worked in the best hocus pocus kind of way.
In 5 weeks, the pain was cut in half and in 4 months, they were just about gone.
I don’t feel much of it now. So what medical science couldn’t do in 2 years, Randløv and Boesen fixed in 4 months!
Okay, back to subject.
I know that I haven’t become fat from eating lettuce and exercise less.
As I said, for a while I didn’t exercise at all and when I began the fertility treatments, I was afraid of working out too hard.
You might accidentally kill the fetus! (?)
So each time I had been inseminated or had eggs put back up the exercise was done moderately.
No heavy lifting and no getting the pulse up in the red box.
And that of course has a certain influence.
But that said I have felt a big difference as to how my body has taken the exercise and diet when I have been in treatment versus when I haven’t.
There is no doubt in my mind that the fertility treatments (hormone treatments) have “fucked” with the metabolism – pardon my French!
When it comes to my training, I haven’t been able to reach the same results as I used to and it has been going steadily downhill with my performance.
And that goes for the periods where I have been able to train normally – and hard – too.
When it comes to food, it seems that my body has stored every bit of fat, I have eaten, in the bodily depots. Nothing has gone to waste. Everything has been kept.
Especially when I became pregnant in December 2014, my body exploded with rocket speed.
Sideways…so to speak…
In the really uncool way.
My weight went all the way up to 72 kg (158 lb.) – and I’m only 1.59 meters (5 feet 3 inches) “tall”.
Even though I’m not pregnant anymore, I haven’t lost much weight.
I have gotten cellulite on my stomach, which I have never had before, previously it has only been on my thighs and butt, and it hasn’t disappeared again...
I’m not happy about it and I’ve had a crisis over it.
However, I don’t mind paying the price of becoming a little fuller in the figure if I can just get the “prize” in the end and I get the opportunity to call myself “mom”.
Right now though it’s a little hard for me to believe that I’ll ever get that opportunity.
PS. I am definitely not the only one, click here and read the wonderful post from Signe from ErDuHerIkkeSnart, (it's in danish - Sorry guys!) so there is no doubt in my mind: Fertility treatments and weight gaining – sometimes – go hand in hand. For some more than others.